Operation Duromine

I’m Fat.

Not just fat. Obese.

According to the BMI chart anyway.

So, enter Duromine.


What’s Duromine? Well, in simple terms, it is an appetite suppressant. Less food, apparently, will make me less fat.

At $98.00(Aust) a script, which lasts one month, it had better bloody work. Thankfully, my health insurance covers $57.00 of it so that really works out to about $1.36 per capsule, which I take one a day. That isn’t bad really when you think of the cost of snacking and excess eating. I am actually saving money by being on this stuff.

So, I started the ‘wonder drug’ 7 days ago and am taking the lowest dose possible being 15mg. This is because it can interfere or react with Tamoxifen. I take this tablet each morning at about 5:30am with my breakfast of a tuna and baby spinach wrap. I find no urges to eat until lunch time and even then, I have to remind myself that I need to eat. Lunch is something simple like a small fruit salad and yoghurt or a tin of tuna with a small salad. Dinner is something like a small seafood stirfry with brown rice or a piece of steamed fish and veg.

How have I done in the 7 days?

I have lost a grand total of ZERO!

Yep, not even a hundred grams. A big, fat, round zero.

At least my lack weight loss matches my body shape.

Ok, so this week hasn’t been very normal with having surgery on Wednesday (which I should have lost 5 bloody kilos because I fasted from 7:30am until 7pm!) and have had a sneaky glass of bubbles or two but seriously, come on! Nothing? Not one little gram of weight loss?

I shall not give up though. This stuff is going to work. I already feel better being on it because of the reduced food intake.

Are you curious about the side effects? So many people have an opinion on Duromine weather they’ve taken it or not.

These have been my side effects.

  • Dry mouth (water fixes it everytime)
  • Slight headache in the first couple of days
  • Vagueness (said good morning to the same person twice one day)
  • Tiredness in the first few days

Obviously, each person is different with medication and side effects but these have been mine which I was quite pleased about.

Lets Not Judge Amanda Bailey.

I thought a lot about writing this blog about being on Duromine because, as a society, we love to judge people. Put them down for whatever we can. Does it really make us feel better to do this? Does it improve our own lives to judge and gossip about someone else?

My answer is no. What’s your answer?

I decided, obviously, to write this because I feel I have been honest and transparent since I began this blog and for anyone who ever read my previous blog called I WOKE UP FAT, will know that I am probably a bit too open at times.

My fat life started approximately 9 years ago. Initially, I thought it was due to being diagnosed as a coeliac (allergy to gluten) and I still feel this has a big part to being a big girl but also, as my relationship with Sam progressed, so did my weight gain.

The meals I ate were often the same size as Sams meals. This is not healthy! I should not be eating the same amount as a grown man who does manual labour for a job. I am an office worker perched on my bum all day.

I did spend a year at the gym a few years back and had very good success in losing 18 kilos. It meant I was at the gym 5, sometimes 6, days a week, my diet was impeccable and I was motivated.

Once I had gone from being 95 kilos (Yes, 95 whopping kilograms) down to 78 kilos, it all stopped. My weight loss journey seemed to be over. Try as hard as I did, nothing was budging.  Then, as happens with many people, I got frustrated and fed up and GAVE UP.

Fast forward a couple of years and whilst I haven’t gained all of that weight back, I have gained a couple of kilos and am still very fat. I am only five feet tall so, carrying more than say, 60 kilos, is a lot of weight for a little person like me to carry.

My starting weight, 7 days ago, was 81.9 kilos. Wow, I am putting it all out there aren’t I? How many of you would happily put your weight and age out into the big wide web for lots of little judgemental gossipy eyeballs to read?

So anyway, I am on this Operation Duromine to lose weight for the upcoming surgery being my breast reconstruction. It is a short term ‘fix’ and my fingers are crossed it works. I am hoping to have this surgery in January, 2017.

Obviously walking wasn’t going to do it because after breaking those couple of bones in my ankle and leg, it made walking a wee bit tedious.

Oh, about that. The surgery on Wednesday went really well (they removed two of the pins holding my bones together) and aside from that huge long fasting session, it all went without incident. I did meet a wonderful lady in Recovery who is the sister of a work colleague. She was just gorgeous and caring and kind. Thanks for looking after me Mim.

Hopefully, I can start walking again comfortably and carefully to kickstart this weight loss that my surgeon, Dr Kollias, is adamant I must do. He would like me to lose 20 kilos prior to my surgery which not only will make me look and feel better but will also reduce my chances of getting breast cancer again.

This is not a ‘commercial’ for appetite suppressants but more a journal for me (and you if you are interested) to see how I travel with this weight loss stuff.

So from me, my big fat 0 weight loss, I bid you farewell… until next time xx

2007 V’s  2016

Ps: The gorgeous lady in the photo with me is Author Tamara K Martin. Keep an eye on your bookshelves people, her writing will be out for you to buy and read soon 🙂



Yep, I’m in remission. It’s over.


Of course, there is always the chance it’ll come back but there is also a chance that many things ‘may’ happen, so why dwell on it? Why spend my days worrying about what might happen? No more.

Continue reading “Remission”

The Nurse

Remember the olden days when a hospitals Matron was a very fussy and old fashioned – do it by the book – kind of person? Well, I think I met one of these people today.

She walks into the waiting room, stands in front of me with one hand on her large hip and says,

“Amanda Bailey?”

I was playing candy crush as I do every time I am in a waiting room and I say “Yup, that would be me”.

With a frown and a very stern manner she asks if she could ‘please interrupt me for an examination’.

The way she said it was like I was doing something wrong but I followed her into her room and she just stared at me again but this time, at my neck and the burn.

She muttered away and looked down my top without asking, looked at my back and continued muttering away. She said I would need this and that and what not and then said she’d see me after my radiation.

I couldn’t understand why I needed to see her again because I had just seen her, she had examined me and told me what to do so, after I’d been zapped, I told my amazing radiation lady that I really didn’t want to see that weird nurse again. She laughed and said she’d tell the nurse I was in a hurry and would grab the cream and padding I needed for me.

Well, I went into the little change room cubicle which barely has room for one person and blow me down but the weird old Matron nurse is banging on the change room door and comes in with me! FFS, there is no room for one of me but to have another large person, lets just say, it was too close for comfort. Talk about being in my personal space!

While I was driving home, my phone rang. I am incredibly well behaved when it comes to phones and cars and refuse to answer or even look at my phone. As I have two more appointments in town this afternoon, I thought it would be best if I checked who had called because I might have gotten earlier times for my other appointments.

The message was from that NURSE! The message went on and on about which creams to use where and how she should have given me a ‘wee container’ to mix two of the creams in. OMG – she had told me all of this in her office and again in that little tiny change room and now again on the voice mail.

Anyway, as I am not getting radiation on my shoulder anymore, I can use zinc which is awesome. It takes away all pain.

Is it noticeable? I figure it looks a lot better than wearing that sanitary pad on my shoulder!

Photo on 17-12-2015 at 11.24 am


Medicate Me!!!

Where have I been? Just over there, in bed.

Remember how I said the drugs have now changed and my chemo will be different that the last four? Well blow me down if they weren’t right. I can barely stay out of bed for half an hour, the body and bone pain never leaves, have over dosed accidentally on codeine and we all know what that does to ones bum…… enter hemorrhoids AGAIN!!

Today I’d had enough. I rang my girls (they’d be the oncology nurses who give me my chemo) who in turn rang my oncologist and here’s what we are going to do.

Dr Sid (oncologist) is sending a script via fax to my local chemist right now which I’ll get Sam to pick up on his way home. This will be a very strong pain killer.

If I am still crap tomorrow, I get two nights in a single suite at my private hospital so they can take the pain away and give me some relief.

My temperature keeps popping up to 37.9 which does make me smile because it is the temperature of 38 degrees that we have to worry about. It never really gets there.

I think that is about all I have to report on today. Please have my very sore bum in your thoughts today as well as my body and hopefully, I’ll be right as rain tomorrow.

Oh thats right, one more thing. Totally busy and preoccupied with myself, I hadn’t gotten anything for Sam for his birthday yesterday. Oh I was a right misery guts laying in bed knowing I couldn’t drive to the nearest shopping centre about 20 kilometers away when I remembered, he talked about wanting one of those full sized wine barrels. I wizzed down to the landscaping yard, in my town, bought it and they delivered it free for me. So when he got home, there it was. Phew, gotta love country folk.

Over and out


I’m Alive

Just a quick post to let you know I am still alive and moving.

I am not going to go into great detail just yet because I am ready to go back to bed for a while but lets just say the internal spa treatmenet I had yesterday (commonly known as chemo) was a breeze. Seriously, it was fine. Lots of pretty coloured liquid squirted into me, pretty orange wee wee to follow and I was outta there.

It was a two hour session but with all that goes on and having Sam and Accalia there with me, it was out of there in no time.

Sam and I even decided to have a quick lunch at the pub on the way home and then I hit the sack. I was in bed at 3:30pm when we got home, work at 5:30pm for my daily mum call, woken at 8:30pm by Dr Hands (Sam) to take my temperature and demand I drink water and administer some panadol and that was that.

The excellent and amazing this about this chemo, and I hope it continues, are the dreams! They are better than any movie or book I have read. Lots of drama and excitement and yes, a wee bit of hanky panky.

I can’t say I am feeling all perky and lovely today but that alright, I can feel a bit pooey.

I am waiting for this particular drug the nurses called ‘dexis’ to kick in because apparently I am going to feel amazing and wonderful and everything will seem perfect. Apparently I’ll be on these dexis for two days ‘woop wooop’ party at my place and then I’ll go through withdrawals for two days, party is over on Sunday peeps.

The only thing I am really suffering from besides tireness is a slight headache.

I’ll tell you more later because now I have been fed and watered, I am going back to bed.

Thank you to everyone for the amazing and wonderful good wishes.

PS: I think I am going to have poop problems because there was a lot of talk about constipation and binding (that is a crap word hehe) but thanks to my night nurse, I have sachets to help that happen. I do NOT like NOT pooping.

Me and Dr hands 🙂

Back to bed for me xx


I Sprung a Leak!

Yep, you read it right. Drippy is still here. Apparently, I am still draining too much for the drain to be taken out so I shall continue to walk around with the ‘handbag’ over my arm carrying my drip bottle around for a day or two longer.

Lets talk about last night.

Have you ever plugged your mobile phone in to charge, had a chat on said phone and tried to walk off still attached to the charger? Well, I did something very similar to this last night except there were no mobile phones or chargers involved. It was drippy.

Let me explain drippy in more detail. I have a tube which has been inserted into my body to collect the gunky gooey stuff that collects in the wound of where my cancer was taken out. The tube is quite long and is attached on the other end to a plastic bottle where the gooey yucky stuff goes. This plastic bottle resides in a pretty floral handbag which I hang on my shoulder when I am up and about. I ‘tuck’ the cord into the bag so I don’t get caught on door handles or dog heads and things like that.

Come bed time, I lay the bag next to the bed and pull the cord out of the bag so I can roll around and not be too restricted. I then get my breast pillow which, like the handbag with the drip thing in it, goes over my shoulder and the pillow part goes under my arm to rest on the wounded area.

As you can see, it takes quite a lot of planning to organise all my bits and pieces at bed time. So, imagine the drama I face when I need to get up through the night to wee. I can’t blame having been fast asleep and disorientated on the part I am about to tell you but I am going to go with, Endone. I must have been endoned out of my head or something?

I got out of bed, walked through my walk in robe, into the ensuite and felt a bit of a ‘pull’ under my arm where there are wounds and dressings from the boobectimy and lymph node removal and I thought the feeling was just the dressings moving with my movements so I took one more step toward the toilet and I felt and heard a ‘pop’. O. M. G. I have broken something! I was absolutely terrified to even look and see what I might have done but look I did. I noticed that where the drain goes into my body and under the clear tape there was now a liquid circle.Yup, it looks like I have broken it. It is 2am and I have sprung a leak!

Sam woke and looked but didn’t think there was anything wrong and I said I was going to ring one of my nurse neighbours because I knew she was awake. She comes over lickity split and checks the wound and yep, I had pulled it out a smidge but she explained the tube was nice and long and still in my body and whilst there was a little leak, it was all packed well and I was just fine.

Thank goodness for my medical people. Dr Hands (Sam), Night Nurse Clare (next door), Day Nurse Lisa (across the road) and of course the good people of St Andrews Hospital. I wont be cross at them for making me keep drippy for a little longer. They know their stuff I’m sure.

PS: I bought some stuff for pooping, wish me luck