Still Here :)

 

I have had so many lovely emails and conversations with people wanting me to ‘come back to blogging’. Wow, I can’t tell you how much of a lift that gives me. Thank you to everyone who has enjoyed, laughed, cried, worried and read my blog through my Unscheduled Journey with Stage 3 Breast Cancer.

Let me tell you about………………

The Ankle Incident 3rd of May, 2016

So, it seems that after chemotherapy and radiation, your bones can become quite brittle.

My oncologist and surgeon had both told me repeatedly I needed to lose weight as a cancer prevention because carrying extra weight can cause the cancer to return. Therefore, I came up with a plan.

My energy levels were still very low so there was no way a cardio or aerobic exercise was on the agenda but I thought, if I drive to the city from home (45 kilometres) and park on Fullarton Road in South Australia, I could then walk the 2 kilometres to work. As there is no bus that goes to where my car was parked, it meant that I couldn’t ‘cheat’ and get a lift after work but had to walk back.  That meant I was walking over 4 kilometres a day!

My weight was starting to come off and even though the mornings were very cold, I felt great for all of the fresh air and walking until I rolled my ankle.

There was a section of my walk that was dirt and there was a teeny tiny pothole that I lost my footing in and over I went. As I went down, I heard to very loud noises which turned out to be two broken bones. But, get this….. there I am, dressed in my work clothes, lanyard around my neck with my security pass, backpack on the ground, sitting in the dirt crying and holding my ankle and NOT ONE PERSON HELPED ME.

There were people everywhere too. People were cycling on the track behind me, others walking their dogs, people parking their cars five meters in front of me and walking to work. How on earth have we become such a selfish or scared society that we won’t approach someone who is obviously in distress?

I called the ambulance myself and waited half an hour (the emergency department is five streets away) and then spent three days in hospital following surgery where there were plates and screws put in to my tibia and fibular. I was in a Cast for three weeks with a walking frame, then a ‘moon boot’ for five weeks with a walking frame and am having my second surgery on the 7th of September 2016.

THE BREAK AND SCAR

 

So, my weight loss adventures obviously came to a halt. I was off work for 8 weeks and am only now just starting to walk properly again so am hoping my surgery next week doesn’t set me back any more. The surgeon did say that I will be fine after a few days rest following this surgery so am not too worried.

THE X-RAYS OF THE PLATES AND PINS

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A further 8 weeks off work was certainly not what I had in mind seeing as though I had returned to work only three months previously. 10 months off work with Cancer was enough I had thought but the universe had other ideas hehe.

THE CAST AND MOON BOOT

As I was unable to put any weight on my left leg for 6 weeks, Sam (Dr Hands) made a makeshift kitchen in the living room and even had a car fridge with treats, drinks and lunch options.

THE ‘KITCHEN’, DAISIES FROM MUM AND FLOWERS FROM WORK

So, this is the update on the ankle business.

Are you a suspicious person? I haven’t been known to worry about black cats, walking under ladders etc but for some reason, after I broke my ankle, I kept worrying that there was once more really bad thing left to happen to me.

I couldn’t get rid of the feeling even though people would tell me that there were 2 breaks in my bones so that adds up to three things with the breast cancer. I was also told that as I had breast cancer surgery and nodes removed, that could count as two and the third was my ankle.

Well, I had my third one which I’ll tell you about later but here is the short version.

My tax bill for 2015/2016 is a whopping $9,800.00!

That, right there, is my third thing.

Anyhoo, thank you to all who had messaged me with well wishes and worries of the cancer returning but be assured, all is well for the time being.

My current focus is a reconstruction (which I am sure to tell you all about when it is done) and, my wedding to Dr Sam the Hands himself.

Lots of Love from me

me

Xx Talk soon

Shut Up!

At the risk of being unpopular, sounding like an ungrateful person, this is something that is really starting to piss me off. I need to talk about it and just put it out there. I do not wish to offend any person and I am not dismissive of the awful times people go through with losing someone so close to them through cancer. My heart and love goes out to everyone who has been touched by this awful disease.

Having said that, I am still strong on my opinion of asking to please, consider your topic before discussing it.

I am a pretty easy going person. I don’t care what a persons view is on religion or politics, I really don’t care where you live or who you live with, black, white, gay, straight, man or woman, dog or cat……. I can pretty much talk to you about anything without getting offended or feeling out of place. And yes, I will even talk to dogs and cats.

Talking about anything and everything is pretty interesting to me because I love hearing about things that I don’t know about. Oh, unless it is about retaining walls and storm water flow. Those topics generally bore the shit out of me.

Recently, I finally found another topic that many people want to tell me about that I have no interest in talking about.

Death from Cancer.

Now, it seems, so many people want to tell me about a family member, friend or someone who died from cancer.

Shut. Up.

Do I look like I want to hear your story? No, I don’t want to hear your story. Although I am terribly sorry you have had to go through such a loss, I wonder why you think I want to hear about it.

Sometimes I really feel like saying, oohh, do you have another story just like that to tell me because that one made me feel marvelous! Please please tell me another story about someone else who had breast cancer or another type of cancer and died.

You are telling me about someone who had the same or similar illness as myself and then letting me know (as if I don’t think about it a hundred times a day already) that it kills people.

Shut. Up.

I know people die from cancer. We all know people die from it. What we cancer survivors do not want to hear about is how it can kill them.  Cancer survivors are not free of cancer. We have fought for our lives but it doesn’t mean we wont have to do it again. We hope we never have to fight like we did for our lives but most of us have it in the back of our minds. Is the cancer still in our bodies?

You do not tell a new mother about the awful death of a baby you know about.

You do not tell a parent sitting by their sons hospital bed following a car accident that you know three people who have died in car accidents this year.

You. Shut. Up.

Why do people feel so comfortable talking to a cancer survivor about the death of other people from the same horrible disease?

Do they think we feel ‘lucky’ to have had cancer and still be standing here today?

It is not up to you to ‘make us feel better’ with these stories.

Please, stop talking to us about deaths caused by cancer. It is not a conversation I wish to be a part off. That may change at some stage but today, no, I do not want to hear it.

Shut. Up.

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Thank you Samantha for these beautiful flowers that are all starting to open. xx

Bad to Good – Make it Happy

I have had a really shitty crappy awful week.

Yes, a lot of it has had to do with my bum and bowels but I will give you a break with all of that information.

I have slept a lot which is not something I will ever complain about. The medication I am now on with the new chemo drugs make me quite zombie like but that is ok. Much better than the pain and discomfort that I suffered last chemo when they changed the drugs and advised I would probably only need ‘panadol’ to deal with the pain. Yeah Nah, Endone is what I needed. I don’t like endone as a general rule because it makes me nauseas and constipated and dopier than usual but it is what is needed to get me through the chemo ‘feelings’.

On some nicer news…….. The dogs got new beds recently. Brady and Kelly have both turned 7 years old and any dog trainer will tell you that is the dogs 2nd change of life. Dogs go through a ‘change’ at the ages of 2 and 7 – both Kelly and Brady are the same age. Kelly (our Staffy X) has become very sooky. Needs/wants cuddles constantly. Brady, who has always been the gently, frightened and most obedient dog has become a grumpy old man. He does NOT like it when Kelly settles in to her bed next to his. I now have to separate their beds at night time before they go to ‘real’ bed time. Kelly is a lazy b*tch who refuses to hold her poopies and weewees and has decided the hallway (carpet) is her toilet so she now sleeps in the garage. But, before  ‘real’ bedtime, the dogs are in with us in the house and run around like crazy fools, play tug of war, demand cuddles from Dr Hands and I and have sleeps before dinner and bed. Sometimes, Brady goes onto his bed first but when Kelly goes onto hers, he growls and huffs and puffs and carries on like a fool and I have to move his bed away from hers.

I did manage to get a photo before this all occur occurred though.

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Today, my wonderful mum came to visit me as she does most weekends. I haven’t posted her gorgeous square yet but I will do that a little later but look at the beautiful flowers she bought up for me. She almost always brings beautiful flowers for me to cheer me up. The thing that I really hate about her visits is that I can see she suffers looking at my bald (but almost all fluffy with new hair) head, my red and itchy eyes, runny nose, tiredness etc. How does a daughter comfort her mother who is suffering watching said daughter deal with cancer. Thankfully, we laugh a lot. Mum and I can laugh at the stupidest things…. I want to mention Sam here but that would seem rude hehe. My mum, Sam, Inlaws, Tamara, Accalia, Cousins, Neighbours, Furbabies and everyone inbetween keep it real but achievable.

Flowers from Mum

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Oh, and another thing, we harvested another Cauliflower this week, our neighbour John recons we could get about $10.00 for it because it is bloody huge. Excuse the fat bald chick holding it but it is to give you a perspective of how big this thing was

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But, I’ll have you know, I have lost 8 kilos since this cancer bizzo stuff so thats a good thing right?