Cancer is Lonely …..

As the title says, cancer can be lonely but also, so very boring. I can fault no one for making me feel lonely except for the chemo treatment given.

This is going to sound a little strange but I think this is the best treatment I have had. I had it on Thursday 2nd of July and had a sensational two days following. I felt upbeat, energised, hungry and happy.

Come Sunday, that all goes to shit. I am not tired, can’t stay awake, have no interest in talking, eating, drinking or even opening my eyes for that matter.

Today is Wednesday and beside the battle between ‘Bailey and Brady’, nothing much has happened.

I am Bailey.

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This is Brady

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As any dog trainer knows, dogs have their behavioral changes at the age of 2 and 7. Brady is going through age 7 behavior change and we are butting heads. He is being ever so naughty. Not coming to me when I quietly and gently request. Looks on at me mockingly when I request he remove his smelly butt from my sofa etc

But, beside all that, I have felt that I have done nothing but sleep since Sunday until today, Wednesday evening. I felt ever so teary earlier today but that was just some girly crap and went away quick enough.

What I am so very thankful for is my wonderful neighbours in my lovely little village. Dr Hands went and bought me a bottle of bubbles because I needed something to give me a lift and that whole bottle didn’t even touch the sides. A quick text next door to Night Nurse and all was good in the world as a new bottle of bubbles arrived at my door step (do not judge one with cancer) and we even had some lovely chats, laughs and gossip.

Speaking of neighbours, did you know these neighbours of mine are from England and dont eat until around 8pm at night??? Who the hell eats at that time of night? Well, they do……… it is just wrong if you ask me but moving on…

You have no idea that sleeping from Sunday to Wednesday night can be so lonely until you go through it. And this comes from someone like me who loves her bed, own company, books, dogs etc. If I can become lonely and teary through this spa treatment  effect, I dread to imagine how it would be for someone a little more social and sun shinier than me.

I dont want to sound like a lecturer but seriously, if you have a friend or neighbour going through this shitty illness, extend a hand. Weather it be an ear or a chatty mouth, please give it. If I can be teary because of no company, and I have a Dr Hands in my life, then I dread to think what it would be like for someone more social than myself.

My High note of the week was a sensational package left in my letterbox (I missed my visit from postie Ashley) which was a gorgeous square from Josie who is an amazing lady at work. She has made some amazing gluten free treats for me at work so it was quite a surprise to get a square from her!! Also, what I should mention more than anything, is the notes, letters and cards I receive with these squares. Thank you so much Josie for my lovely square which actually almost matches another square I have here ……

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Isn’t this square just amazing? I love it to bits n pieces.

Goodness, I have been awake for about three hours now, must be time for sleep. Honestly, I am managing about 3 hours at maximum of being awake before needing hours more worth of sleep. So, if I dont reply to your text, email or facebook message, it is probably because I am sleeping…

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzs

4 thoughts on “Cancer is Lonely …..

  1. I agree, I found cancer soooooo boring! You don’t feel well enough to socialise much, plus, I worried about that old low immunity all the time!

    Btw, here in Spain in the heat of the summer, we don’t eat until at least 10pm!

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    1. Are you kidding? 10pm? I am just getting up for my first wee of the night at that time. I think I would have been asleep for about two hours by that time!

      The low immunity is the other worry isn’t it? Sometimes a well meaning person could easily bring in an illness but thankfully, I am never awake to see anyone at this stage. 🙂

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  2. I didn’t have to endure chemo! Lucky me. But I do know that fatigue and loneliness after surgery and waiting for my surgery trying to get cured of diverticulitis. Didn’t want to talk…was like a turtle on a rock…let me sit in the sun and just be. A good support system is the best. They will sit silently with you so u can at least soak up there good vibes! You look very healthy…may be stupid to say…you can do the no hair look!

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    1. I love your description of being a turtle on a rock, yep, that sounds a bit how I wish to be. Except it is winter here so snuggle me up like a bug in a rug in my bed and I’ll be ok.

      That is a nice thing to say. I feel healthy and that is a huge compliment saying I can do the no hair look! Thanks.

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