Today I met Miss Fluff. She is my temporary lump that will even me up until Miss Rubber Lump (the prosthetic) comes into my life. Apparently I haven keep an eye on Miss Fluff because she isn’t very obedient. Oh, I should explain Miss Fluff to you first….
Think of a cotton pyramid (boob sized) filled with fluff and there is Miss Fluff for you. She is pretty good at giving me the bump that I’d lost in surgery and fits beautifully into my donated new berlei bra (thank you berlei!).
Now, where was I, oh, Miss Fluffs disobedience. Apparently she can ride all her way up from being my temporary boobie to become a chin rest! This is not going to work well for someone like me because I am easily distracted and I can tell you right now, Miss Fluff will end up in my mouth before I have even realised she’s moved! I’m serious! I do not pay attention to these kinds of things. I can just imagine being in a cafe sipping my lactose free latte and someone watching Miss Fluff riding her way up and out of my top.
Having been boobie challenged in my younger years, one would imagine I’d be quite the expert in stuffing of the bra but off the many crazy things I did in my youth, that wasn’t one of them. I will just have to keep my eyes peeled for Miss Fluffs attempted escapes but please, if you see someone drinking a lactose free coffee, eating a gluten free cake while their fluffy boob pops out and falls on the floor, just pick it up and hand it back to her. That her will more than likely be me 🙂
Things I have learnt today are…
*. My hair does not look beautiful unwashed
*. Greasy hair is easy to keep off your face
*. I have never wanted to wash my hair so badly
*. Miss fluff has no nipple (yes, I will draw one on)
LOL!! your natural comic x
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DRY SHAMPOO!!!!!!! Best invention ever!! Will solve all (ok not all, but most! of your problems!! Lol. Glad to hear you’ve still got your sense of humour and are able to write. Been thinking about you a lot xxxxx
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Thanks Mia, Sam bought some in for me and it worked like a treat! Not quite like washing ones hair but pretty darn close. Thanks for thinking of me xx I now have a smile on my dial being home my with my man and fur babies.
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